im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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