She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
