I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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