your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
