I am in a vortex of obligation.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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