He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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