Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Randomize
