so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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