I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
you guys were way drunker than both of me
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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