Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
