weddingsv make me drug and hornr
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
