im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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