Are we in a gay sports bar?
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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