I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
