So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
