would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
