My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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