piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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