Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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