i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
