Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
