Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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