We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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