i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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