I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I had to cum in my sink.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
