I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
