Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
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