Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
