Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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