Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
