We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
