i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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