she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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