The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
