yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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