i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
