4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
