My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
