My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
i think i just lost a toe
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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