you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
