Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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