question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
