Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
