so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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