It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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