I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
