Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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