Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
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