i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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