Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
